11 October 2019, by Cheryl Wee
Heya everyone, it’s 32 days postpartum, and I’m feeling good!
This postnatal period has been a better experience for me, as recovery is faster and I’m feeling a lot more positive which I will share more in my next blog. For this blog, I’ll be focusing on two things, my birth story and something I have been sharing on my IG stories, balancing between 2 kids.
I didn’t expect to go into labor 11 days early and was sort of caught off guard. Reason being, for my firstborn, Marc, even with being 2 cm dilated and experiencing contractions, it took me almost a week before I popped (at 40 weeks and a day). So this time round, I was expecting Emma to come at probably around the same 40 weeks, and perhaps water bag breaking or mucus plug show, but none happened.
The night before, we were still having dinner at home with some friends, I did have some discomfort but they were the usual cramps. Past midnight, the cramps happened almost every hour, it did not occur to me that I was having labor pains. In fact, I had planned on going to work in the morning to settle as many things before I went on my maternity leave, which included squeezing in an eyelash extension and pedicure appointment. I was thinking to myself, perhaps I should pop by the gynae and then head on back to work as planned. But by 7am, we made our way to the maternity ward as the pain was too unbearable.
I was a little hesitant to give birth that day as my gynae was outta town, but thankfully, we saw some familiar faces in the labor ward. One of them was Sister Grace, a senior nurse, who was there when I was first admitted with Marc. She sent me into the birthing room and tended to me personally despite the super busy day they had ahead of them. Apparently, it was so full because lots of C-Sect mummies chose to give birth that day.
Sister Grace did a check on me and she said: “Cheryl you’re definitely in labor, you are already 4cm dilated.” I told her that I was afraid to deliver without my gynae, she then said, “Your gynae is not the one who is delivering your baby, you are! Your body will do most of the work, and whenever your baby is meant to come into this world, whoever who will welcome her, all is destined, so don’t worry too much, let nature takes its course, and all will be fine.”
It didn’t take very long for me to be fully dilated and ready to push. Everything went smoothly and Emma was welcomed by a standby doctor.
This experience has taught me a great lesson, we can try to plan out everything in life, we can try to control what we think we can control. But sometimes, we just have to go with the flow trust that all will be alright, because whatever will be, will be. So in the wise words of Bruce Lee, “be like water”. Flow.
Balancing 2 kids
When people knew that a second baby was on the way, most of them would remind us to not neglect our oldest child; or be aware of middle child syndrome; or the other extreme where the second baby will not be as favored.
Keeping those words in mind, Roy and I were very determined to be aware and conscious of our actions, to be fair and divide our love and attention as equally as possible.
As parents, it is our duty to show our children that they are loved and cared for. Everyone’s journey and experiences are different, and I believe we are put on different paths to learn different things. By keeping an open mind and heart, and by trusting our gut, we will make the right decisions and all will be good.