5 September 2012, by Tan Yi Lin

The Day Karma Came To Bite-Bite Our Bum-Bum

I abhor the use of baby talk.

To be more specific, I abhor it when adults use baby talk on babies.

Certain words like “pee-pee” and “poo-poo” are fine. After all, it’s not in our nature to tell infants to “go take a dump”. Same with references to private parts: “pat-pat” or  “wee-wee” or “gu-gu bird” or whatever you choose to use are deemed acceptable for use in public and at times, even cute. It’s also less embarrassing for parents than if you kid decides to yell “PENIS!” in public. A friend of mine taught her son the proper terms for male and female genitals. She instantly regretted it when the boy pointed at a girl at the pool shower and excitedly announced, “I can see her VAGINA!!” The girl’s mother immediately glared at them and drew her daughter away as if they were perverts.

I don’t understand why there is a need to repeat single-syllable words such as dog, walk, milk, etc. I think most of it stems from the use of Chinese, which, strangely enough, sounds fine when you say “zou zou” (walk) or “pai pai shou” (clap) in Mandarin. Of course, names like “Po Po”, “Gong Gong” and “Ye Ye” are completely acceptable, since they are proper Mandarin terms. But hearing people say “walk-walk” or “clap-clap your hands” makes my skin crawl. Why can’t they say “Let’s go for a walk” instead of “Let’s go walk-walk”? Or “Come pat the dog” instead of “Go pat-pat the dog-dog”? There are white dogs. Black dogs. Big dogs. Small dogs. But no such thing as a dog-dog.

I’ve had friends who say that it’s okay to talk like that to babies. Sure, there’s nothing wrong per se. After all, most kids outgrow asking for their “milk-milk” by the time they go to school. It’s just that I don’t see why babies would find “fan-fan” easier to comprehend than just “a fan”. I don’t claim to speak Queen’s English to Coco (or rather, Colette – since I had better not contradict myself now) but I would like to start her off speaking right, instead of teaching her to say “car-car” then having to eventually correct her to say “car”.

It’s not my prerogative to comment on how other parents choose to speak to their children. But with Coco, we make it an effort to request that our parents and relatives address her in proper English. Not “hot-hot” or “cold-cold” please. Please say “What is Coco eating?” and not “What Coco eat-eat?”

Of course, with people whom we don’t see often, we do get caught unguarded and out of politeness, swallow the urge to correct them and just smile. A cousin recently asked Coco, “Where is your shoe-shoe? No shoe-shoe how to go walk-walk?” Talk about double whammy. It was like a double punch to our stomachs but we just smiled (or grimaced) and let it go.


Well, so much for griping.

Dannie accompanied me for my first ultrasound scan last Friday, two weeks after I tested positive for pregnancy.

What we saw on the ultrasound stumped us. The sight brought tears to my eyes. And Dan’s jaw to the floor.

While we sat around in a daze, trying to absorb what the results really meant to our lives, Dan gingerly brought up a point:

“You know, Wife, we may have to eat our words. We may actually find ourselves saying ‘Eat! Eat!’ and ‘Come! Come!’. Or ‘Go sleep…sleep’ and ‘Come bathe…bathe’.”

Talk about having double standards.

Because, dear readers…. *deep breath*...



















(Sonographer's voice) "So there are two water bags... and there are the two embryos... with their beating hearts...."

Hello sleepless nights. Dan looks like he's lost sleep already.

Coco still looking gleeful because she doesn't know what she's in for. In fact, we don't either!

So now you know. Just like the wheels on the bus, karma does go round… and round.


(A shout-out to those lovely readers who noticed my long absence from Maybebaby and wrote emails to ask after me. Thank you for your thoughts and your concern. Love ya all!)

Tags :

Posted on : September 5, 2012

Filed under : Planning For Baby


Tan Yi Lin

Yi Lin

September 20th, 2012 at 4:53 am    

Haha, thanks Jolene for the congratulatory wishes and the encouragement. Yes, thank goodness for the backing of an entire village when it comes to parenting. We really are rather scared but I’m sure we’ll manage (with LOTS of help.) You’re doing well too, babe. Really respect that you and the hubby handle all the parenting on your own without either of your family in Australia with you. RESPECT.


September 17th, 2012 at 1:28 am    

My first reaction was OMG! Then, I’m like oh yay!! Congratulations babe! As they say, when it rains, it pours.. and now your probably making up for your past infertility problem with twins!! not forgetting coco too! Awesome. I don’t think there’s anything to be worried about, you have great family and friends support and having had the experience with coco, it will be a tad easier than first one. No matter what, we, parents, generally pull through, no matter how tough the going gets. It is going to be awesome! xxx

Tan Yi Lin

Yi Lin

September 11th, 2012 at 9:14 am    

Hello hello everybody, thanks for the well wishes, thanks! Haha, enough double talk for now.

Char: Thanks for reading, for leaving a comment and for sharing our joy. To hear that we have inspired others to take the plunge into parenthood is both immensely rewarding – and slightly scary at the same time. I hope it’s not because we have painted such a gloomy picture of IVF that we make people panick and think, “Better hurry up and try now!” Don’t come after me if motherhood isn’t all that you’ve expected it to be! Haha, just kidding. You’re welcome to write to me anytime.

“Jump” really is the word to use, isn’t it? After all, there’s no testing the waters first when it comes to parenting. You just have to talk it out with your partner, make a decision, take a deep breath, take a giant leap of faith – and just plunge right in. Good luck!

YY: Thanks for sharing. It’s not easy to come to terms with prenatal depression when every other woman seems to be such a glowing picture of motherhood. I was fortunate not to suffer from it, but take heart, you’re not the only one. It’s nice to hear that you found my pregnancy entries enjoyable. I re-read some of them recently – and boy, did I come across as a grumpy, irritable pregnant woman at times. But hey, this is a blog, not pro-pregnancy propaganda. I tell it as I experience it. No sugar added.

Hi Joyce: I hope the IVF drugs have been kind to you and that you’re coping well with the jabs. Your doctor should be able to advise you on the considerations of putting in one or two embryos. I recall the general advice during the IVF briefing was that if you’re below 30, it’s fine to put in just one. But if age isn’t on your side, then the recommended number is two. But do talk to your doctor anyway. Sending lots of baby dust to you. Good luck!


September 9th, 2012 at 3:23 am    

OMG!!!! congrats!!!!!!
so happy for u & dannie


September 7th, 2012 at 2:39 pm    

Congratulations!! Heartening to read that you got twins!!!


September 7th, 2012 at 5:00 am    

Hey yilin,
I’ve been following your blog (sneakily) and you gave me the courage to jump into mummy hood. I dunno why, but your announcement of having twins brought so much joy to me as well, that I HAVE to leave a comment. CONGRATS!


September 6th, 2012 at 7:45 am    

congrats congrats!!!
Seems like you have to use 2 letter words more more so that the twins will know each word is meant for them!!!


September 6th, 2012 at 1:38 am    

wow!! doubley-congratz!! 🙂


September 6th, 2012 at 12:32 am    

Hello! Stumbled upon this blog yesterday and I wanted to thank you for sharing your pregnancy experiences. I went through some form of depression during my first trimester and I wished I found your blog earlier! They are informative and funny in so many ways. You and Dannie made pregnancy so enjoyable and memorable.
Anyway, congratulations to the news for having twins!!! Oh well double the fun now!! Cheers!


September 5th, 2012 at 4:09 pm    

Yilin, Dannie,

I am on my first IVF cycle this month and had started as well my Puregon jabs a few days ago, when I stumbled upon your blog.

it had been a joy reading your entries that exude so much humour and positive vibes.
i will soon as well to decide to go for 1/2 embryos ..but later!

Baby dust needed 😉 and do take care !

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