Couplehood

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The demands of parenting may affect your relationship with your spouse, especially when taking care of the children robs couples of their personal and couple time.

 

The reality is, you do not have to do this all alone, and with some planning, you can help you and your spouse become more efficient.

 

• Talk to your loved ones about your work and concerns

 

If finding time for your family and yourself is making your all stressed out, you need to sit down and discuss alternatives. Could you husband help pick up the kids from the child care centre, while you send them there, instead of you handling everything alone?

If being a working mum is tiring you out, would your husband be okay with you working part-time instead? Be honest. By sharing your concerns instead of bottling them up, you can work towards a resolution together.

 

• Mix friends with family

 

Instead of spending separate time with family and friends, it is far more efficient to “share” your time with everyone together. Invite your friends and family over for a fuss-free potluck session. No one is left out and the grandparents, aunts and uncles would only be too happy to play with your little ones.

 

• Designate roles

 

Sometimes, it may be necessary for mums and dads to take on specific roles for greater efficiency. For instance, if your husband’s office is next to a supermarket, it may make more sense for him to be in charge of getting the groceries.

 

Or, if your wife is better and faster at ironing, and you are more efficient at mopping the floor, you would both save more time on household chores by concentrating on what you do best.

 

• Take turns to compromise

 

Being a mum or dad means you may have to make sacrifices to your lifestyle. It could be eating out less, watching fewer movies, or avoiding social engagements on your off-days so you can spend more time with your family.

 

Ideally, you can take turns to compromise so one person does not take on too much of the burden. For example, you agree to miss a yoga lesson to accompany the your child and husband to the movies this week, while dad agrees to skip his soccer session next week to take the family out for a picnic.

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