Republished with permission from Lunch Actually
This article includes real and proven advice from experienced Dating Coaches. Your goal is clear: to be in a fulfilling and lasting relationship with the love of your life.
How do you know when you’re ready for marriage? That's the million-dollar question. Pass that question to your married friends and mostly they’ll answer “When you know, you know!”. Marriage is one of life's biggest decisions, it should not be taken lightly. It’s more than two people being madly in love or love at the first sight. While romance is nice, it can’t sustain a marriage. Here are 5 signs that you’re ready to get married:
1. You Love Yourself
You can't be happy with someone else until you're 100% happy with yourself. Being married is about joining two lives together, not giving up one. Being content in your own skin means you won't be looking to your partner to fill voids in your life.
2. You Know You're Compatible With Each Other
He or she may not have superficial criteria such as how tall he is, how attractive she is, how much he or she earns etc. But she or he is the one who shares the same values as you and has similar future visions. Once you feel you have both clearly and concisely articulated your desires, wants, needs, likes, dislikes, hopes, dreams, and non-negotiables, then you could be ready to take the next step!
3. You’re Financially Stable
Meaning that you are not still in school or you are just starting out in your career. Sure you don’t have to be Mark Zukenberg- rich to get married, but you have to be responsible to provide for your family.
4. You Understand Each Other’s Love Languages
People express their love differently. Some people express love through touch, some through words of affirmation, some through acts of service, some through gifts and some through spending quality time. How does this apply in your life? You and your partner might have very different ways of expressing your love for each other. Your love language might be spending quality time. Hence, you want to spend every free moment you have with him. His love language is acts of service. Due to the nature of his job, he has to work long hours and has to travel often. However, when your car needs servicing, he would settle it for you. According to Dr. Gary Chapman, there are 5 love languages --- acts of service, giving and receiving gifts, quality time, physical touch, and words of affirmation.
5. You Have Passed The 5 Stages of Relationship
There are 5 stages of a relationship. These stages are not linear but cyclical. Even people who reach the fifth and final stage of relationship—Wholehearted Love—will eventually find themselves looping back to Stage 1 to start the process all over again. But you can always find your way back.
If you’re still looking for someone, these red flags to spot whether someone you’re dating is NOT ready for commitment. We’d encourage all of you singles to AVOID these persons because their intention is just to play the game to keep you hooked for as long as possible without actually wanting to settle down! These are some red flags that you should be aware of:
- He or she never felt comfortable introducing you to his or her parents.
- Whenever you would encounter relatives or friends out in public, he or she would suddenly stop holding hands with you.
- Whenever any topics related to commitment came up, he or she would shy away from them and quickly change the subject.
- After breaking up, he or she continues to call you, as if he or she wanted to continue having a hold on you without the commitment of being boyfriend and girlfriend.
Catch Ms Violet Lim, CEO and Co-Founder of Lunch Actually as she shares the secret to a long-lasting marriage in I Love Children Love and Relationship Series here!
This article was produced by Lunch Actually Group, Asia's premium dating company for discerning professionals. It's SDN accredited and has more than 16 years of proven success record in the love industry and over 4,500 happy marriages.
Dating Success Program is a fully tailored, personalized and customized dating program that focuses on mastering singles with the right dating skills to be, meet and choose The Right One faster and more efficiently. On average, Lunch Actually's clients get in a relationship 3-4 months after they attended the Dating Success Program!
Want to know more about the Dating Success Program? Book a complimentary consultation with the love experts here lunchactually.com